How to Help a Friend Who’s Feeling Low — Without Becoming Their Therapist

How can you help a friend who’s feeling low without losing yourself in the process?

When someone close to us is going through a difficult time, we often feel helpless. We want to help but don’t know how. We're afraid of saying the wrong thing… or, on the contrary, of completely losing ourselves trying to fix things.

Yet, support from friends and loved ones is one of the most powerful tools in recovering from emotional distress. And yes — you can make a difference, even if you’re not a therapist, as long as you follow a few key guidelines.

📊 Key Numbers to Understand the Issue

• According to Santé Publique France, 1 in 5 people in France has experienced depression at some point in their life.
• 35% of those suffering from depression never consult a professional.
• However, 83% say the support of close friends played a decisive role in feeling better.

👉 So yes — you can make a difference. The key is to rely on proven psychological techniques like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), which is at the heart of the MindDay method.

1. 🗣️ Create a Non-Judgmental Listening Space

Your role isn’t to solve your friend’s problems, but to offer a safe space where they can speak freely without fear of judgment.

What to do:

• Ask open-ended questions: “What’s been the hardest part for you lately?”
• Rephrase without interpreting: “So you’re feeling drained and exhausted, is that right?”
• Avoid quick fixes or clichés like “Just try to be positive” or “You should go out more.”

💡 You can train your active listening skills using the MindDay app, especially in our “Improve My Relationships” program. 👉 Try MindDay

2. 👁️‍🗨️ Know the Warning Signs

Feeling low isn’t always full-blown clinical depression. But it’s important to be aware of red flags:

• Struggling to get out of bed or concentrate
• Sleep troubles or appetite loss
• Feelings of emptiness, guilt, or hopelessness

⚠️ If you’re unsure about the severity, gently encourage your friend to seek professional help:

“I’m not a professional, but I’m worried this has been going on for a while… and you deserve real support for this.”

3. 🤝 Encourage Small, Concrete Actions

CBT has shown that action often precedes emotion. Instead of waiting for motivation, sometimes it’s the action that helps it return.

Try suggesting:

• A short walk with no agenda
• Cooking a simple comforting meal together
• Doing a 10-minute session on the MindDay app to “pause the mental noise”

🎯 Goal: Create small moments of momentum, without pressure.

4. 🧩 Don’t Become the “Savior”

Trying to “fix” everything for someone — even out of love — can backfire. You risk:

• Burning out
• Creating dependency
• Preventing your friend from reclaiming control over their situation

👉 Set healthy boundaries: “I care deeply about you, and I’m here — but I can’t always be available.”

You can also introduce them to empowering tools like MindDay programs “Finding Clarity” or “Boosting My Self-Esteem.”

5. ❤️ And What About You?

Supporting someone who’s feeling low is a beautiful act of kindness — but it also requires emotional energy.

🧠 Take time for yourself too: mindfulness, journaling, physical activity…
📱 In the MindDay app, you’ll find dedicated exercises to help you support others without losing balance.

👉 Try MindDay for free here

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